Saturday 7 April 2018

DeserT as my real DesserT

An inevitable query that is invariably recurring in my mind. 
                     Has an Indian woman's Rajasthan journey come to a close?




A zillion thoughts stirred up the tsunami of feelings, queries, anticipation and apprehension in me.....


The land that taught me how to be my own ambassador
The land that taught me how to help others and end up being worse than a curry leaf.
The land that taught me 'only dena' and ' no lena' policy.
The land that taught me how to withstand the comments/crookedness of ghori ghora chori choras.
The land that taught me how to be in my wonderland of cheshire cats and dinahs.
The land that made me a part and parcel of many non- bloodly related ties.
The land that made me tie 'rakhis' to countless brotherly ties.
The land that made evolve and involve into a better me......

Something/place/body has forged a void which the new stuffs can never rekindle.....

The land of whites and non-whites where only Apartheid is not in practice.
The land where we are good only when our work is good.
The land where respect is not given but only forcefully taken
The land where white power gets name and fame where others receive only shame.
The land where smile, affection and care never work but only raggada, assignments and re-tests work
The land where people show false affection just to deceive me for their crooked intentions.
The land where humanity is of no use but dictatorship and territoriality of immense use.

Once again I realise,
                           Permanent = Regular
                           Temporary = Extended

  But, I am still me... I just move on knowing the reality that it is time to heal myself from all the wounds(verbal and mental)
Nikhil mon's words sounded sensible once more..... " Chechi, do not be naive wherever you go.Do not exhibit your lack of intelligence, full of nonsense bereft of your common sense".. Hihihi... Still, I am in love with this easeful life sweetly played in a clearly confused, painfully beautiful, awfully lucky, sweet sorrow and genuine imitation tone.  Here lies the real variety as the spice of my viability. The real Rajasthan desert has turned out to be the real dessert of my entity by imparting a lot of flavours( sweet, salt, sour, bitter)  along with the true colours of homosopiens.  I have fallen badly and madly for the land of royals, deserts, forts and CAMELs..Compliments always coexist just like the oxymoronic embellishment  of literature as well as human existence.There lies a beauty in cruel kindness with its manifestation of brutal happiness. Yes, it smells the breaking out of a soul from all the fetters... Can it be addressed as a clarion call? Who knows? I know one thing that I just move on with the hopes and hopelessness which desert has mustered me to master.
              

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